A Letter to the Freshmen

by Eva Barfels | class of 2022 | Oct. 4, 2019

Dear freshmen,

   Please stop being so annoying in the halls. 

Like, for real. Why are you walking so slow? You’re barely moving! Drink a coffee or something. Jeez. I get that it’s early and that you’re tired, but so are all of us. If you need more spring in your step, go to sleep sooner.

   Also, stop with the incessant shouting! You don’t need to be yelling down the halls at 8 o’clock in the morning! You just saw your friends yesterday. Just do what Taylor Swift said, ”You need to calm down - you’re being too loud.” Besides, you’re “too tired” to even move,  remember?

   You don’t need to be walking side by side, five in a row down the hallways. This isn’t Chicago; you aren’t in a gang. Have you been in a car? Ever notice how people drive on the right? Stay in your lane, and keep it movin’.

  And PLEASE don't feel the need to stop at your friends’ lockers during passing time, especially if it's in the middle hallway. You become a speed bump in everyone else’s road, and trust me, we’re not afraid to run over you. Reality check: You are NOT the only ones in the halls. Other people have places to be. So please, get out of the way.

   No, this is not the whole freshman class, but it’s most of you. Ironically enough, it seems to be most freshmen every year. I think it’s time to break the tradition; be the freshmen class that changes the stereotype.

   Just please do everyone a favor: Zip it. Move it. Thank you. 

 

Sincerely,

The rest of us